run bike swim beat cancer

This time of year, a new year, I’m usually massively positive and blindly optimistic about what the future will bring.

This year, however, I feel less enthusiastic and I’m perhaps more cautious about being so overly positive. Maybe, this is understandable while I’m still recovering from chemo and the future is not as certain as I once imagined. But a little bit of realism and acceptance of the practicalities of life is not a bad thing. Sometimes it’s forced on you – but I did find comfort, friendship and love in places I wouldn’t have expected, as well as in the places you would expect.

The future for me now means looking after our health and wellbeing, and our happiness, and not taking it for granted.

It means caring for, loving and letting our children grow, to be confident and happy. Being part of their lives, near or far, and cherishing every moment. This I struggle with at the moment, I can’t imagine how to live without them being at the very centre of everything we do – my heart breaks every time I think about it. But all families have to do this – for me it’s a huge, scary, unknown, but change is the only constant in life !! and I have to grow up and accept it

It means looking after our parent’s health, wellbeing, happiness and care – because we want to 😁

I don’t know what I want from 2023 to be honest. Maybe if I have no expectations then I can’t be disappointed – but that doesn’t feel quite true to my nature – I guess I do have a natural disposition towards being positive, and I like to plan and have goals.

I want my family to be happy.

I want to be happy.

I want to be cancer free – yes, but never a given.

I want to be active and fit – yes, as long as I feel good doing it.

I want to worry less, especially about things I can’t change.

I want to appreciate EVERYTHING as much as I possibly can.

I am always genuinely grateful for the love I feel, the experiences I have and the life I live – maybe that is the key – just to keep on being grateful.